Four years ago, the country was shocked at the outcome of the 2016 World Series of Politics when the darkest of dark horses triumphed over the establishment. In that contest, the New York Elites came up short against the New York Six Packs. The final score of the decisive game was Six Packs 7 and the Elites 6 – a clear victory.
The Elites
and their supporters were incensed and bitter.
“This is not
fair!” they proclaimed. “We got more
hits than they did,” explained their team captain.
“Who cares?”
replied Captain Six Pack. “The rules
only count the runs, not the number of hits.”
Over the
next 4 years, every time Elitists referred to the prior lost contest, they always
added, “We got more hits than they did.”
In fact, many of them began murmuring that the unfair rules should be
changed such that the number of hits should now determine the winner. Fairness, they grumbled, demanded a rules change.
It's four years
later and we are all spellbound as the 2020 World Series of Politics is drawing to
a close. The New York Six Packs – the defending
champions – seem to have met their match against the Scranton Scrappers. The Scrappers have the upper hand. It’s the top of the 9th inning and
they are leading by 4 runs to 1 in the final game. The Six Packs are at bat. There are 2 outs and the batter is facing a
count of 0 and 2.
It looks
grim for the Six Packers. While no
winner can be called yet, as the game is not over, hope of the Six Packs
prevailing is vanishing. Indeed, in
the Scrapper’s locker room, the champagne celebration has already been set
up.
At this moment, the Six Packs call a time out. The team owner then issues a statement that the Six Packs have won and
are champions once again. He explains
that all 4 of the Scrapper’s runs were achieved by cheating, and he has the
evidence to prove it. The umpires seem
unmoved and even some of the Six Pack’s players seem confused.
Yes, I have
concocted this fairy tale from my own imagination. It’s so silly I would be amazed if any reader
has made it this far. Could you imagine
if such a scenario actually occurred in real life?
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