Whistleblower Holiday Cheer 2018!

‘Twas the night before Christmas,

And all through the House,

The creatures were stirring,

And ready to pounce!

Why wait for Mueller?

What could he teach?

We already know

That we must IMPEACH!

With Dems in the House

So anxious to blame,

Their strategy is…

Ready! Fire! Aim!

Both Chuck and Nancy,

Will not take the fall,

Not on their watch,

Will there be a wall.

The Dems are all joined,

In salivation,

At the prospect of,

Investigation!

We watch GOP

Twirl and deflect,

Supporting a man,

They just won’t reject.

The only Repubs

Who show any fire,

Are senators who

Announced they’ll retire.

While all of us watch

With ire and confusion

On Russia and Stormy

And ‘No Collusion!’

The press and our pols

Care nothing for us

It’s ratings and votes

That drive their bus.

Is there no honest man

True to the bone

Who can rescue us all,

Perhaps, Michael Cohen?

And Dancer and Blitzen

And Warren and Booker

All Jumping into

The pressure cooker.

Who will emerge

From their Gang of Plenty

To take on His Highness

In 2020?

Joy and Peace!

Comments

When Should Doctors Retire?

I am asked with some regularity whether I am aiming to retire in the near term. Years ago, I never received such inquiries. Why now? Might it be because my coiffure and goatee – although finely-manicured – has long entered the gray area? Could it be because many other even younger physicians have given up their stethoscopes for lives of leisure? (Hopefully, my inquiring patients are not suspecting me of professional performance lapses!) Interestingly, a nurse in my office recently approached me and asked me sotto voce that she heard I was retiring. “Interesting,” I remarked. Since I was unaware of this retirement news, I asked her when would be my last day at work. I have no idea where this erroneous rumor originated from. I requested that my nurse-friend contact her flawed intel source and set him or her straight. Retirement might seem tempting to me as I have so many other interests. Indeed, reading and ...

The VIP Syndrome Threatens Doctors' Health

Over the years, I have treated various medical professionals from physicians to nurses to veterinarians to optometrists and to occasional medical residents in training. Are these folks different from other patients? Are there specific challenges treating folks who have a deep knowledge of the medical profession? Are their unique risks to be wary of when the patient is a medical professional? First, it’s still a running joke in the profession that if a medical student develops an ordinary symptom, then he worries that he has a horrible disease. This is because the student’s experience in the hospital and the required reading are predominantly devoted to serious illnesses. So, if the student develops some constipation, for example, he may fear that he has a bowel blockage, similar to one of his patients on the ward.. More experienced medical professionals may also bring above average anxiety to the office visit. Physicians, after all, are members of...

Electronic Medical Records vs Physicians: Not a Fair Fight!

Each work day, I enter the chamber of horrors also known as the electronic medical record (EMR). I’ve endured several versions of this torture over the years, monstrosities that were designed more to appeal to the needs of billers and coders than physicians. Make sense? I will admit that my current EMR, called Epic, is more physician-friendly than prior competitors, but it remains a formidable adversary. And it’s not a fair fight. You might be a great chess player, but odds are that you will not vanquish a computer adversary armed with artificial intelligence. I have a competitive advantage over many other physician contestants in the battle of Man vs Machine. I can type well and can do so while maintaining eye contact with the patient. You must think I am a magician or a savant. While this may be true, the birth of my advanced digital skills started decades ago. (As an aside, digital competence is essential for gastroenterologists.) Durin...

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